We buy the shampoo that most accurately insults our hair. “For dry, lifeless, dandruff addled hair” - yup that’s me.
my brother tried to pick up a banana to make it look like he was talking on the phone but all the bananas in the bunch came with it and he just looked at me and went “i guess it’s a conference call”
A++ recovery
don’t encourage him
(Source: easycomfort, via fuckyeahloldemort)
me thinking about myself: She’s cute I support Her
(Source: naturallyverybeautiful, via wavesoftheworld)
You never realize how boring your life is until someone asks you what you do for fun.
